Promises
by petitestars
Summary: Jack makes a promise...


Jack had two choices set out in front of him.

To his left, a massive stack of paperwork that General Hammond had hinted that perhaps he should finish by the end of the week. To his right, his much-used handheld Gameboy, complete with the latest version of Mario Cart loaded into it ready to go.

Jack's hand had just twitched towards his right when a loud knock caused him to instead pull the first folder from the stack of ominous-looking paperwork to rest in front of him.

Pen poised above the blank document, Jack called the intruder in, expecting to see the bald head of his boss coming to check on his progress, "Enter."

A blond head poked around the doorframe and Jack relaxed back into his chair, his hand once again reaching for his Gameboy, "Carter! Didn't think you were due back on base 'till Monday."

Carter had been on leave since her run-in with the snake. An incident that the captain had barely survived and that Jack had barely managed to wrap his head around. Carter, being Carter, had seemed to bounce back, taking it all in her stride once the initial withdrawal and depression had passed. Jack didn't know how she was doing it.

"I had my final evaluation with Janet this morning, sir." She stepped into his office, eyeing the Gameboy in his hand and the paperwork stacked on his desk with the sharp eye that was so valuable in the field.

Jack chose to ignore the disapproving vibes she was sending his way. He motioned her into the seat in front of his desk.

"And how did it go?" Jack didn't really need to ask. As her CO, he'd been receiving all of Carter's physical and mental evaluation reports; that paperwork he hadn't just pushed to the side.

Carter's lips pressed into a thin smile that didn't match her usual brightness, "I'm cleared for active duty starting Monday, sir."

Jack ignored the unusual lack of detail in Carter's answer. He was just happy she was going to be back with the team. He clapped his hands together, "Excellent Carter. We should celebrate, dinner at O'Malley's tonight with the guys?"

Carter nodded but Jack could sense the distraction in the tense set of her shoulders. He noticed for the first time that she was gripping a folder tightly in her hands.

Jack motioned to it, "Hammond send more paperwork to add to the stack I won't be doing today?"

Carter glanced down at the file she was gripping and Jack watched as her fingers tightened momentarily on the paper before they relaxed in a less crushing grip.

"No sir," Carter's voice was hesitant, and her eyes refused to meet Jack's as she spoke, "It's what I was actually coming to ask you about."

"Oh," Jack's curiosity peeked, "What's on your mind, Carter?" Jack's mind flashed to what could be in the folder. Given recent events he wouldn't be surprised if it held her resignation. Not that he would accept that of course.

"When I was… it.. when… " Carter stumbled over her words, then paused and took a deep breath, "When I was taken over by the …" she trailed off.

"Goau'ld," Jack filled in the blank for her, watching as her face twisted into a grimace at the word.

"Yes sir. I…" Carter held out the file to him, suddenly seeming to change track completely, "I came to get your signature for this, sir."

Jack took the offered file, opened it up and scanned the contents, the words settling into his brain as he tried to make sense of the legal document.

_I, Samantha Carter, request that in the event that I am unable to make a decision__…hereby give permission… termination of any treatment which prolongs… no extraordinary means… _

"Carter?" Jack turned his steady gaze to the captain.

"It's a living will, sir," Carter's words were soft, "If I'm ever left incapable of making a decision based on my health, I'm giving you and Janet permission to carry out my wishes."

"No extraordinary means," Jack read the words off the paper, "What exactly do you mean by that?"

Sam was silent for a long moment before she spoke, pain hinted beneath her words, "When Jolinar was in control, I was trapped in my own body. I could see everything that was happening, but I couldn't move. Couldn't stop him from hurting everyone around me, from using my body to-" Panic started to creep into her tone and she stropped, pressing her lips tightly together in what seemed to be a vain effort to prevent more words from spilling out.

"Can't have been fun." Jack winced as soon as the words left his mouth. Way to be sensitive, Jack berated himself, "That was, uh-"

"It was one of the worst experiences of my life, sir," Sam cut him off, her voice determined, the panic from a moment before gone, or perhaps just hidden, "Being trapped like that, I'd rather… I'd rather be dead, sir."

Jack understood. He'd take a coffin six feet under over a snake in the head for eternity any day, "I understand that, Carter."

"The will is just to legally ensure that, in any circumstance where I'm unlikely to survive without life support, I'm not kept alive," Sam motioned to the papers spread in front of him, "Not the same as being taken over by a Goa'uld, I know, but…" She shook her head, "I can't be like that again. Trapped in a body that I can't control."

"Okay," Jack nodded, noting that Janet's signature was neatly printed into the space designated to the first notary on the papers. The second notary space was blank, "You want me to be the, uh,"

"I need a second signature," Carter eyed him nervously, "I could ask General Hammond if you're not comfortable-"

Jack shook his head, "It's no problem, Carter."

"I wanted you to know about the will because," Carter's voice dropped, "Out in the field, it's different."

The bonds between soldiers in combat were more solid than most marriages. Jack had made his share of promises to comrades. He had never broken a promise to a fellow soldier.

"I won't let it happen again, Carter," Jack made sure to emphasize his words. He meant that; no one in his team would ever go through the horror of having a snake in their head, not if he could stand to stop it.

Carter shook her head at his reassurance, "But if it does-"

"Carter-"

"It could happen again," Sam's voice was clear, "If it does. I don't want to live like that. I can't…" The panic was back in her voice and Jack stopped her from continuing. He knew what she wanted.

"You have my word, Carter." He held her gaze with his own, "I won't leave you like that. Ever."

Sam let out a long slow breath, "Thank you, sir."

Jack picked up his pen and, without hesitation, scrawled his signature on the dotted line before shuffling the papers back into the folder and handing it back to Carter.

"I'm sorry," Jack said softly, his meaning clear. He'd kept vigil by her bedside, watched as she had emerged from the snake experience slightly damaged but still very much alive. But he hadn't spoken the words he had wanted to, hadn't wanted to burden her any more than she already was.

"It wasn't your fault," Sam said, "I don't blame you. The only one to blame-"

"It wasn't your fault either, Carter," Jack interrupted her.

Sam gave him a small smile, "I guess we can just blame the, uh, snake, then sir."

"Sounds like a good idea," Jack said, he gave her his trademark boyish smile, hoping to lift the mood, "You know what else is a good idea Carter?"

"Pecan pie in the commissaryry, sir?" Carter seemed to read his mind.

"Precisely, Carter." Jack stood up and motioned to the still untouched pile of work on his desk, "I need a break from all this paperwork, lets grab the guys and go eat pie."

Sam chuckled, "Okay sir."

Jack grinned back, the thought of the living will pushed to the back of his mind. He tried not to think of the chances of needing to execute it. With their day job, danger seemed to follow them to every planet they visited and Jack could only pin his hopes to Sg1's luck of always seeming to pull through. But even so, if it happened, Jack had never broken a promise to a fellow soldier. Never.

***


End file.
